I'm a liar!

I said I would post a picture this week - but I didn't.  I DID run every time I planned to - and I ran hard - but I am a cranky lady this week and so I feel like a picture shall wait until certain things pass.

....

I switched pills.  (you may stop reading if you feel like this is a TMI).

I switched back to Yasmin from Yaz... and.. hello PMS.. i forgot what you were like.

I'm a bitch!!!!

And it is not delightful - ergo.  No picture.  Ok?  Ok.

I'm glad we had this coversation.

Side note -   I've racked up  20 more km - and 4 more hours of running this past week... and i now own a beautiful blue pilates ball.   It is glorious and I used it in my living room tonight.  CN can attest that I looked a bit like a fool rolling around doing all sorts of balancey things trying the ball out.

CIAO FOR NOW

Sunday Night Football

It's funny how when you don't typically watch or care about certain things - like the CFL.... that all of a sudden you can get SUPER invested in one game.

Today - that game was the Stamps vs the Roughriders - the Western Final.   The Stamps lost in the frozen wasteland of McMahon Stadium in Calgary - and I was choked.  Absolutely choked.  For the team, for the fans... and for the fact that they put their butts on that ice cube of a field and unfortunately - froze.   So after that upset... we switch channels and watch the Flames take on the Redwings.  4-1 flames.  THEN all of a sudden it's 4-2... 4-3... then with 3 seconds to go the Redwinds score and tie it forcing overtime and BAM the Flames lose too.  What a poopy day for Calgary sports!  C'est la vie.

Running wise, I'm doing well.  I am running hard and consistently.  4 times a week with a pilates class at some point and my at home pilates dvd on non gym days.  My mind isn't so great though.  At this point I'm wanting to see results.  I'm feeling a bit chunky... and I wanted to start feeling a little bit more slender at this point.  I'm over a month in on this challenge - and granted - it isn't totally about the weight loss.  I do want this for my body's own good.  I want to be fit.  I want to be able to push my own limits.  I wanted to be able to run for an hour without stopping... and I can now!  Now I want to be able to run for two hours without stopping... and hopefully fast enough so that I can complete a half marathon within the boundaries of 2 ish hours.  I guess the tough part is keeping up my motivation to see the results.

Some things that may help...

Drinking more water.  Keeping a water bottle on me in my purse at work so when I go to the back I can take a nice long swig of water... never fully letting myself get thirsty.

Eating less Starbuck food.  I try to watch what I eat at work... but I'm bad every so often.. and frankly - i want to cut out work food all together.  It's pre frozen... calorie packed... bombs that do not need to enter my system.  Stupid delicious gingerbread biscotti.  I shake my fist at you and your awesomeness.

Having my work beverages be of the coffee/tea variety and not of the milk based variety.  I'm really enjoying matcha mixed with hot water.   It gets me going and it tastes pretty good.  Also... it's pretty good for me.. so I may rock that drink for awhile and see where it takes me.

Throwing my body off.  I think my body is starting to get used to the running... so I need to challenge it and maybe throw in rowing for 10 minutes at it... or doing some hills...  biking... maybe I'll put some spinning back into my schedule.  One class a week won't bulk up my legs too too much.  (BREANNA... get on that membership and let's be spinning buddies again!)

Anyway.  I guess my morale is a bit low today.  I have accomplished more than I already thought possible... and I think to see changes I will have to take it to the next level.  Starting with a lovely gym sesh tomorrow night! Running and pilates anyone?!

Ta!

19 hours.  (PIC COMING UP THIS WEEK!! AHH!!) 106 km!  (.. whoa)  ... and low team morale!

Article.

http://jezebel.com/5689226/a-call-to-arms-and-abs-quads-calves-and-shoulders


I love this article.  It got me all ready to kick some ass.

Ran today for an hour after being pretty much pooped.  So in order to overdo it - I biked 20 mins after the run.  Why not right?  Tomorrow is Pilates and  Yoga Night!!!

15 hours.  86 km.   I'm sleepy.

Idol Love

Ok... so I have a crush on Carrie Underwood's voice AND Kelly Clarkson (KC i've loved since the original airing of 'Idol'.... including From Justin to Kelly.)  It makes me miss singing.  It makes me want to have a voice transplant - until I start singing and realize that I am quite capable of carrying a pretty tune.  They inspire me.  What other women inspire me?  Ok... let's just debrief...

Kelly Clarkson.

I adore her because she stays true to herself, can sing the shit out of EVERYTHING, her belt.. Gah, she's gorgeous - no matter her size.  She may not be a great actor (From Justin To Kelly... ouch).  But she's definitely someone I look up to as a person and singer.

Carrie Underwood.

Just a little dumpling of blonde cuteness.  How can one not love her?  Physically - she is stupid inspiring... she works her ass off to stay in shape.  Her legs make me want to do lunges from Toronto to Calgary and back.  And her wedding pictures?  If you haven't seen them - googles them NOW and enter the little girl fantasy grown up into this whimsical country love affair fairytale.  She's who I wanted to be when i was little.  Will we see a Carrie Underwood sex tape? No.  She's a role model and I kinda like that.

Crystal Renn.

Straight size model who was in a whirlwind of eating disorders until she listened to her heart and body and ate - becoming the most successful plus size model EVER.  She's hot!  She makes me feel like buying a size Large isn't the end of the world!  She is voluptuous (a word that actually I hate - but see its beauty in her).   She makes all the nonsense in my head so relatable.  Her book 'Hungry' saved me.  It saved me from hating myself...  I know that's a big thing to say - but it's true.

Marilyn Monroe.

Size 14.  Sex icon.   Real name?  Norma Jean.  My Granny on my Dad's size = Norma.  Granny on Mom's side = Jean.  Coincidence?  I think not.  Bwa ha!

And that folks are the people who are inspiring me today.  There are so many other powerful, beautiful women out there.. but those are the ones on my mind today.  I guess it's because I've been feeling tubby... and these women make me feel like I fit in.  They make the things I don't really love about me really gorgeous.... they are my curvy club.

12 and a half hours.  ......... I cant think of the km right now.  AND I HAVE A CUT ON MY BABY TOE!!! Tragedy.

Thought of the day.   Amount of minutes run - or distance covered.  What is more important to losing weight?

A

11 and a half hour picture update!

Well... here it is - a picture update of how I am doing.  I don't see too many changes.. but running for an hour certainly has gotten easier.  When I reach 20 hours I will post another picture!! O la la

11 and a half hours.  76 km.   Homesick.  

A Little Off Topic

Let's start on topic.  I have surpassed the 10 hour mark!!!!!!  *applause*  I have officially run 10 hours and 37 minutes which you know.. ain't too shabby and is leaving me a little less flabby (ha!).   I'm impressed with myself.  It has been a tough week motivation wise - but I cranked out 2 runs with one in the plans for tomorrow and one sunday afternoon.  So by the end of the weekend I should hit 13 hours.  I'm starting to get excited about the 100 km landmark.

Anyway.  Tonight I went to a show.  It's the first show I've been to in quite a while and it was so refreshing.  I saw "Pricilla Queen of the Desert" at the Princess of Wales Theatre in Toronto.  It's a really touching story revolving around a drag queen's journey to meet his 6 year old son.  There were sequins.. Madonna songs...  as well as a lot of really heartfelt REAL moments that made me so proud to be in the audience and proud to be supportive and in love with the fact that this is what I want to do.  Ahh.  Go see it!   It will be something that will light up your night from the minute the lights go down and the giant disco ball descends from the ceiling illuminating the entire theatre in sparkle.  Delightful.  Simply a surprising delight.

After the show ended I heading to the train and ran into someone from my schooling past.  It's funny how you can be so happy in one moment and then feel like an insecure 15 year old who is being judged for everything and nothing all at the same time.  It was an unreal transition of realization that I am SO happy to not be surrounded by Sheridan anymore.  I can't deal with it... or the people.  I love what the school gave me and what I have learned as a performer and person there - but I never realized until my heart started racing in this stupid anxiety at the train station... that I was really depressed and the catalyst of that was the way I was treated by a lot of peeps at school.   Such a see-saw of highs and los tonight.  THE BEST PART - is I got off the train at a station with my lovely evening company and switched to our other train and moved on with my life!  And now I am home.  With someone I love.  Typing this out to digest it a bit... and then the sequined belt comes off and a new day starts tomorrow.


10 hours 37 minutes.  70km.    Growing up a little at a time.